Two days ago I gave a warm up question that said: "1. What's up?" The next two questions were math questions, don't worry, but I like to keep the kids entertained every once in a while. Some students raised their hand and asked how to answer the question... Most people did NOT answer "Not much," or "Nothing." Almost everyone got all smart-alecky and answered literally: "The sky," "the ceiling," etc. One person that I called on got very literal:

"The ceiling, the floor, a classroom, another ceiling [we are in a two story building], the sky, birds, clouds, space, stars..." and this cute little wandering-lost-puppy of a girl pipes in with eyes wide "and then Jesus."

Haha, you had to hear her to understand, because she's not religious or anything, maybe Catholic background, but it certainly made me smile.

Now, I'm not usually one to complain, but allow me to take some time and...vent.

I'm not sure if this day could be more stressful. The day started off fine and I got to school on time. But by second period I had a student jumping around swearing because he burned his arm on the old fashioned heating vents in the classroom. After swearing once I asked him to stop and he proceeded to curse in the next sentence ("Yeah, but that s*&# is hot!"). So I asked him to step outside since by this time class was clearly disrupted. He refused, swearing again, and I asked him to please not make me call a security guard to take him out of my classroom. At this point he jumps up and throws his desk aside, storming out of the class with the cloudiest look on a kid's face I have ever seen. ps. This guy is like 6'2", maybe 180-200 pounds and in junior high.

Am I done? I wish. My little cold starts getting worse and I sneeze about 8 times during fourth period. Throughout the day I am trying to talk to the principal because on my watch during Young Life last night some students left early and were seen smoking pot by the custodian.

Fifth period I've sent out two or three students throughout the class for disruptions, talking, laughing, etc. The girl I accused of smoking weed (turns out it was not her) asked me why I "had to rat [her] out like that."

And sixth period a girl scratched the face of one of this ADD kid that would not do a single thing if I didn't hound him all the time. He had three welts across his cheek. He said she just did it out of nowhere. So I sent them both to the office.

I feel like I am in an urban school in New York or something. I know it's not as bad as that, but seriously some of the kids I teach are messed up in the head, in the home.

Yesterday after school these two 13 year old girls stayed and we talked. Well, first I kept them after because they don't know anything and to be quite honest I have a problem with taking it personally when students don't learn crap, and then I feel like I have to teach them no matter what instead of just letting it go. I'm working on it!

After I showed them how to do their homework, they just stayed and one of them started sharing about her life. Now, these are the lowest achieving 8th graders in the school, and I have three classes of them. I think these are representative of a lot of my students' situations at home.

•She said she might get sent to another school for her poor grades.
•She said that her whole family is stupid. That the only one who graduated...HIGH SCHOOL... was her cousin or aunt.
•She said her dad calls her dumbass "and worse."
•She said her brother doesn't even work anymore, and he tells his mom he is going to school but she thinks he is just taking money to buy pot.
•She said her brother comes home at 5 or 6 in the morning and sleeps on the couch.
•She said her whole family comes from bad blood and indicated the general direction of her future by making a funnel in the air. All going downward.
•She said her dad is from the worst part of Mexico.
•She told me about her grandmother's revolver and how she keeps it in the kitchen (in Mexico).

And on and on...It's too much for me, people! What can one person do? I told her she is going to change her family's bloodline, change the direction of her life. She could be the one to bring them honor. I don't know. It's so ridiculous. I feel very discouraged at this public school.

ps. This whole conversation started when we were talking about what she likes or what she wanted to do. Her answer: nothing. At all. No hair, makup, teaching, kids, nothing. No reading, writing, acting, fashion, nothing. She said her brother is the same way and wanted to kill himself but he is going to go into the army so he has some purpose in his life, and if he dies at least it will be with some meaning...

It's been a while. I know.

A couple of weeks ago we hit the half-way-through-the-year mark. I asked the students for feedback and received some pretty great responses. Most involved just asking for more bathroom passes and less homework. Here is a cute one that I responded to:

"Dear Mr. V
What I like in this class is that when we see videos everyone is quite. Also that I like to sit next to E. because she's smart and I am to but when we work in group me and her always use are brain and we also help each other in our work. That's what I like from math class."

And here is one to keep me my ego in check:

"I like hand on activities. Just work sheets. To improve you could not be so boring and not talk as much and be more caring, and let us eat in hear."

Last:

"Nothing has to be improved or deproved. :) "

Merry Christmas! I'm a few days late, I know. I've been having such a phenomenal vacation, I can't believe I have to go back to school in a week and start teaching again.

My homework assignment to the kids over the break was to "Find Mr. V downtown over the holidays." So far I have seen three kids but I don't think they saw me.

So far this break I've seen a bunch of movies, did a photo shoot (or three), hung out with lots of friends, and slept a ton. Wish it could last forever!

xo, Phil

Break time! First day of my winter vacation and I was very productive. I helped my dad set up a concrete bench in his yard, went to the farmer's market, had lunch with friends, delivered some wedding photos, went to the movies with a couple of kids from Young Life and Felipe and his crew, and now I am going to have dinner with those guys! Sweet.

Yesterday I gave quizzes to all my math students... AND a Christmas party :) I had kids sign up to bring stuff, and they pulled through! Two different classes had their parents order pizza and bring it to class. Crazy, huh? Little Ceasar's $5 Hot-And-Ready pizzas are hard to beat.

Here's a wedding photo!

The other day, perhaps in a dream, or maybe while daydreaming, I had a minor bout of inspiration. I do dream about my teaching sometimes, which is a little sad, because that means even when I am sleeping I cannot escape the stresses of my job.

My moment of inspiration had to do with discipline, and I was thinking of effective ways to keep kids in line. Now, let me pause right here and say that this is why I *&#@! hate teaching in a public school. Why should I be thinking of ways to keep kids in check? Does that sound like a fun way to live my life? Do kids hate school?

Anyways, I thought it would be funny to make a kid write something over and over again like Bart Simpson does at the beginning of every Simpson's episode. So this boy in my class was giving the double bird towards some student outside of my class (TWO MIDDLE FINGERS!) and I saw him and I said, "K____, what the heck?! Take a break." I always make kids go outside immediately if they are being terribly distracting. Then when he came in I made him write

"I will think before I act."

on one side of a sheet of paper until he filled it up. That's only about 33 times, but I think he got the idea.

It was awesome.

I've been offline for a long time! I actually went to Austria over Thanksgiving. Well, I actually took FIVE DAYS off of work before Thanksgiving plus the three days I already had for vacation. I was in Europe for 12 days total, and it was amazing.

I totally screwed up my substitute lesson plans somehow, and I was quite dismayed to come back to rumors of other teachers having to figure out what my kids were supposed to be doing. For someone who is terrified of off-putting others and caring a bit too much about what people think, I feel a little sick thinking about my reputation in the eyes of my colleagues at the junior high school.

I tried to make amends by giving Austrian chocolates away at our math meeting on Tuesday :)

I should be in bed but I just wanted to say this: It's Veteran's Day and I got a day off in the middle of my week! How great is that? I was worried it would be an unproductive day, but I did so much!

I deleted bad photos from a wedding I just took pictures for, went bowling, finished grading a stack of tests, starred the best photos from the wedding, had dinner with my sister and then a second dinner with my good friend Felipe, then played board games with him and some of his Young Life guys.

And by the way, I went bowling with a big group of junior highers, many of whom are my own students. I was VERY reluctant to spend my day off with my students, but I did, and it was fun (mainly because I kicked their ass at bowling).

Ahhh, there is nothing more satisfying than feeling caught up.

There is this student teacher at my school right now who I have a bit of a crush on... I'll just leave it at that, because I don't want trouble, or drama. :) But she's super sweet. I hear her heels clicking through the hall and I freeze, waiting for her to pass my door.

She wears sexy glasses and is quiet but beautiful-- my favorite type.

The Halloween Costume

There is a girl in my class who I'm pretty sure views me as some type of father figure. At the very least, she looks up to me, which is nice. That is probably the only reason why I put up with her ridiculousness so much, because she is the quintessential Class Clown.

At the beginning of this week when students were talking about costumes for Halloween, this particular student announced "I'm gonna be Mr. V for Halloween!" This is a 12 year old Mexican girl. She continued, "But Mr. V, I don't have curly hair so you're gonna have to straighten yours."

What kind of backwards logic is that?!

THE KIDS THE KIDS THE KIDS

Sometimes teaching feels amazing and sometimes I feel despair. One of my classes out of five (1/5 or 20 percent or .20) is just so smart! It has 33 students, all seventh graders, all simply beautiful, precocious, able young people. That class happens to be in my first hour of the day, and the rest is downhill from there.

In one of my lower-level classes, I am constantly telling this one kid who thinks he is SO smart to just show his work. He is able to do a lot of the problems in his head, but I insist that he shows his work so I know that he knows. Right? One of his recent homework assignments actually had this written on it:

"Uhhh!! Mr. V look I showd my work happy now! ?! :] Erick"

I just wish you could hear his voice. This kid talks sooo funny! Just imagine Al Pacino in Scarface as a 12 year old boy. The kind of guy that says "Say hello to my little friend." Cuban-Miami tough guy speak. Now read that again out loud. It makes me smile every time.

The Librarian

I've officially finished one month of full-time work at Santa Barbara Junior High and boy am I tired! I think I've figured out that if I go to sleep by 10pm each night I will be feeling just perfect for the next day. But I haven't actually gone to sleep at 10pm yet!

There is a girl who is in 9th grade this year who I taught last year. She is a quiet little Mexican girl who I taught how to solve the Rubik's cube. She is a pretty good artist and her family is very poor. Every time I talk to her, she lives in a different place with another family. Her mother and her and her two younger siblings take over a room or two in a place with another family and that's how she lives. Without much.

So she stops by the junior high as she walks home from school sometimes and visits her old teachers, myself included. She was asking me how she can do community service hours and I told her she could work at the library! I told her she should just get a job there afterwards and wouldn't that be nice to get paid so she can buy her own stuff and not have her mom take her clothes and give them to her sister? We were dreaming about all this stuff and guess what?

The next time I saw her she had picked up an application to work at the main library (that she had never been to before) and was already filling it out. I need this sort of encouragement when I begin to think that my kids are worse than squirrels on coffee.

Alright alright. I'll try to be a little more diligent here since I know you are all dying to hear about my escapades in the classroom.

I've been teaching full time for three weeks now. What the heck?!

Today in class this 8th grade girl says to me, "Mr. V. There's a rumor going around that you have a six-pack. Is that true?"

Whoo hoo! Welcome to junior high. I don't know where in the world that sort of rumor started, but I kinda liked it so I didn't really confirm or deny it.

For those who are unsure, a six-pack in this situation refers to abdomen muscles, not alcohol.

I got a job! I'm the new, official, 7th and 8th grade math teacher at Santa Barbara Junior High school. The day that I interviewed the principal wasn't there, but I got this text message from him later in the day:

"Word on the street is you did exceptionally well today."

How about them apples?

Oh, and I'll be making 42K this year. A nice step up from my baby 15,000 last year haha. So if you want, I'll buy you lunch. But you gotta ask first.

Hello followers. You still there? I haven't given you very many tasty morsels to snack on this summer, I'm well aware. I'm just not teaching right now, so there are no stories to tell!

But that is not entirely true.

At the farmer's market last week I saw one of my favorites from this past year, Karinna. She had asked me to take pictures for her and her friends on graduation day and I did, but I never gave her the pictures. She saw me on Tuesday and I felt incredibly guilty and went and burned her a CD right there. And met her and her dad, and her best friend Daniela (plus mom). It was really great to see them, and Daniela gave me a big hug. Those girls make me smile!

And now that all of the GATE kids are no longer at the junior high, I caved and accepted their incessant friend requests on Facebook. Those kids are chatty! But very bright. Here is an excerpt from a book a couple of my OTHER favorite students are writing (and they sent me chapter one in an email):

"The music blasting from Blake’s headphones sounded, to me, like some sort of musical mosquito, hovering on the edges of my hearing. It harmonized with the hidden bugs singing around us. The clouds above me hung as if suspended by fishing line, like something from the set of a elementary school play. Fake, that’s how they looked. Like some soccer mom volunteered to make the set, and then realized what she had just gotten herself into. I could just see her, futilely trying to stick the cotton onto cardboard and ending up with fluff hot-glued to her French-manicured fingers."

Damn! That's good.

Here's a recently taken photo for you:

This summer is absolutely flying by! Who let July sneak in the door? Seriously. I haven't had a chance to breathe yet. One of my favorite things this summer has been going downtown and seeing old students. I see these punky ones ALL the time. Ones that I have definitely sent to the office before when I was subbing. Now they slap my hand and say "What's up, Mr. V"

I took pictures for a mormon wedding last week! And I am shooting a wedding for an old friend of mine, Addie Brown. I am super excited about that! Whoooooooooooo

I'm done for the summer! School ended and I was so shot. It's been a crazy summer so far. I moved June 1st and I think I've only slept at home 5 times in the past three weeks. I've been camping out, at a Young Life camp, housesitting, etc.

All I really want is to be downtown editing photos. Here's a couple for you!

Good Lord, people!

Apparently some junior high girls that I taught last year got ahold of my phone number and decided that last night was the perfect opportunity to leave me 27 prank calls. I'm assuming they stopped either because they used up ALL of my voice mail space or it was something like 2 in the morning. After the third call I turned my phone off and when I got up this morning my voice message lady told me, "You have 24 new messages."

But honestly, it made me smile.

I know I haven't posted in a while. Honestly, I'm tired of school and all I really want to do is be taking pictures. All the time. Here's one I took yesterday:


Cool, huh? But I am still teaching every day. Our school got canceled two days last week during the crazy crazy fires that happened. If you read the news, you heard about the fires. So I had a nice four day weekend.

I'm writing because this kid today in my fourth period class just said some ridiculous stuff that I thought I would share with you. First of all, he has this terrible attitude every single day. He's not dumb and he's not poor. He just "hates math." His attitude causes him to give up so easily on stuff that I know he can do.

Anyways, today before class I was just talking to him and trying to encourage him a little. I told him I thought he could do everything that we've been doing so far. I said he's got to enjoy it a little because he's going to be taking math for the next four years. This was his response:

"If I had a choice between taking math for the next four years or slitting my wrists, I would slit my wrists."

What the heck, man!??! Geez